Health: Dicovery Project

 For the past few weeks in health, we have been looking at topics that relate onto it that is of our own choice. We begin trying to discover at the certain parts of health that we would like to deeper understand. There were many topics that came to mind but what stood out was mental wellbeing for me, especially mental disorders. I have been long fascinated with how the mind works, how complex and how it can affect our lives. With the mental wellbeing, there were many that I wanted to pick such as the Troxler effect. Which when staring at a singular point for a long time can result in fading and morphing. But the most interesting place where it can take effect however is in the mirror. Look at a singular point in the mirror, without averting your eyes for 10 mins. When the Troxler effects kicks in, demonic, monstrous images can be seen the mouth, eyes, nose getting bigger and or even someone staring at you from behind. It is an eerie phenomenon and a creepy one at that. But, simultaneously, it is entertaining and interesting.

However, that is not the topic that I chose, instead, it is one that I have been more fascinated at for much longer than the Troxler effect. Psychopathy and sociopathy, for years now I have been in wonder of both of these mental disorders. Watching documentaries, reading books and trying to understand the concept. Primarily with psychopathy, I became interested so by my love for crime and gore. There were many serial killers that have been classified as a psychopath. One of the cases I was interested in the most was the case of  Richard Kuklinski the famous "Iceman"; named as he would freeze his victims to disguise the time of death. Watching a documentary that speaks with the man about what he has done. He has shown no empathy nor sympathy as he talks about what he does. However, it is to point out that his victims were not random rather they were people that have wronged him and his group; as well as he has been paid or ordered to do so. Though that does not at all take away from what he has done. It may be generalized that when psychopaths speak of the wrong that they have done, they would brag, laugh and mock their victims. Yet, that was not the case in this, showing that not all psychopaths are alike.

Sociopathy, however, is not a topic that I dwelled deeper into as psychopathy. I have been introduced to this much later and by the form of Sherlock Holmes. 'Sherlock' a British crime television series feature Benedict Cumberpatch. In one episode of the series, he talked about him not being "psychopath" as called by Dr Watson but instead explains, and I quote "I'm a high-functioning sociopath. Do your research.". This introduced me to a whole world of anti-social disorders. By researching and understanding for a couple of years I have come to the conclusion of doing this topic as my project. 

What I have done so for this project was essentially an essay for informing of both about the earlier mentioned mental disorders. For this such was written: Mental Disorder. With that as well, I have written a poem.

Long enough till I realised staring at the abyss. 

Nothingness is seen, no something, rather, something nothing.

Home is solitary, window a jar, with door dehisce. 

As though the house agape, inviting, it is not trusting.

But through its charm I was lusted, looking for what I wanted.

Unbeknownst to me, however, I began to be hunted. 

For the crave that I looked for, I was presented with terror.

Rushing deep and running heap what I saw wasn’t an error.

For what I felt during the glimpse I found that it was a sphinx.

An empty shell no face at all, a deep dark hole only sole.

Yet though I still wonder, was it here or was it yonder?

The lonesome house grazed with thunder, a place where I wander.

Though with much that’ ve happened I am gravel, unravel.

Inquire, pray tell, unfold, expound, what is it that I’ve found?
But I’m sure that t’ was grave, because of the horror it gave.

No warmth, no light, no orth, nor right, as to caress it spite.

Peculiar, much more eccentric, the thought is’ ry hectic.

No thought is thought with all that I have thought I thought I thought.

The spheres could see, the sight bearer, with abode it’s wearer.

Riveted they were, on the figure. Some, getting bigger.

They gawked at the seeming abyss, the air for it to kiss.

Though, they’re views, conviction amiss, as ‘it’ was just a myst.

For sight cannot determine what’s inside, even if tried…

The holes the next, speaking much vex, munching on much hex.

They speak the figure, configure, talk such to transfigure.

Gob the movement, not the amusement, as it’s imprudent.

Upon their motion, the words came flooding down the ocean.

Dragging it further through the void wanted to avoid.

Why it has happened so and how long ago, that I don’t know.

It breaks the soul if thought what it was once so, has now done’ go.

If and what if, it had been, not what is has been, what be.

Be, so and so, wouldn’t it grow, would it change what it show?

Mentanation, attention it need, before it concede.

I can only guess what was done to it so, pure sorrow.

Neglect, direct, dilemma that then prolonged caused trauma.

Problem, being between the devil and deep blue sea.

Help is needed a clear aid to those that have conceded.

After all such experience have now only realised.

The pain of the agonized, how they’re criticized.

Through their darkness let us be light and through their blindness let us be sight.

After doing so I have finally created a piece of artwork that takes from the poem that I made.

The work is to be viewed from a further distance a couple of metres away. It was quite an abstract and an unusual art style that I have done so for this piece. I took inspiration from Yuko Tatsushima, Jungi Ito, Kim Jungi and Zdzislaw Beksinski mainly. The seemingly awkward positioning of the figure on the left suggests almost non-human-like. With that comes to the proportion of both hands as well, that does not fit the body, suggesting that it is not his. The overstretched face which seems like a mask makes it uncanny to the viewer. The colour scheme mainly blue depicts the horror of the colour.

Blue may be a favourite colour for many, having a cool, pleasing tone to the eyes. However, as we see through history, blue many not be what it seems. Through the horrors of the holocaust, we can trace where this sinister colour comes from. The poison gas which was inserted in the chambers that killed thousands and hundreds of thousands of people was cyanide. But over time, when mixed with the many elements that come from the atmosphere changes into a tone of blue. Implemented with this art, we can see the progression of the blue that comes and surrounds the figure. It represents the suffocation from having this certain disorder. 

The other elements present such as the faces, eyes, mouths and the hands are the unjust societal views on this topic. We tend to judge and misunderstands many of what psychopathy and sociopathy. We look down on the person as having an evil view. We perceive them as a menace. However, if we can only see, like how the figure stares back at the viewer. We need to stare back ourselves as well, should we be more understanding, what should we change, what can we change?